Sunday, February 24, 2008
Hugs
I've got a friend lately who has all the sudden started giving me the biggest, longest, most personal hugs ever. Its a little random, as our friendship has never really involved much of anything beyond a high five. But evenso, I really enjoy it. It's great to get a occasionally get a hug that says, "hey friend. I enjoy you as a person. Let me share that feeling with you." Sure, its random and sometimes a little odd, but I've never pulled back from any of her hugs...no matter how out of place they may be.
Monday, February 18, 2008
Off The Grid: 2/18/08
Seeing as how the spotlight is on the EAP and Technologic, I think I can post here without worry. It may help me ease my mind.
Do I feel bad about asking her to leave my house? Somewhat. I wanted her gone because I wanted my space and I wanted her to actually try and do something with herself. I do feel bad about the way things ended though. Sure, the girl is clinically batshit crazy, but she had some good traits about her. While I can't say that I ever want her back in my life in any shape, fashion, or form, I can honestly say that I hope life picks up for her. She'll be the first to tell you that she's had a shitty life -- and I won't disagree with her. Yes, its true that a good deal of it is her fault, but there's only so much that you can do when there's no forward momentum in your life.
I still miss Michele. As always, I could write a 5,000 word essay on that subject with lots of old pictures and bad music from The Cure, but in the end it would just be 4,996 words to much. It's been almost four years and everytime I think I've finally let go, the sinking realization sets in that she was perfect for me and I failed to move. I think its the last part that hurts the most.
I'm very much at a loss for what I want to do with my life. I've groomed myself to believe that business is where its at and what I need to be doing. Marketing, management, IT, information systems and the like with an MBA on top of all that. The funny thing is, there's a better chance of me winding up working at a newspaper than there is of me working at a Fortune 500 company. And you know what, as long as I'm happy I would be absolutely fine with that.
I love my mom. And my dad. And even my baby sister -- who turns 21 in a month -- too. I'm very blessed to have a family I love and one that loves me back. Throughout my travels, I've found out that my life is not the norm for everyone.
I'm not sure why lately, but I have been loving milk. And hot toast. Not necessarily together, but that's fine too.
Sleeping alone is fine. I enjoy my space, my covers, and the ability to fart in my sleep without waking up wondering if I farted. But there's something nice about sleeping in the same bed with a woman from time to time. Their sheets are clean, their pillows are fluffy, and the room smells good. Then there's those moments when you wake up and realize that she's rolled over to where she's sleeping on your back. As much as you want to move her because its sort of uncomfortable, you let her stay. It's actually more comfortable that way.
There's something about the breeze of early springtime. With its arrival comes the promise of new adventures and untapped potential. However it also carries with it an ocean of memories and emotions that you thought you had forgotten...
Do I feel bad about asking her to leave my house? Somewhat. I wanted her gone because I wanted my space and I wanted her to actually try and do something with herself. I do feel bad about the way things ended though. Sure, the girl is clinically batshit crazy, but she had some good traits about her. While I can't say that I ever want her back in my life in any shape, fashion, or form, I can honestly say that I hope life picks up for her. She'll be the first to tell you that she's had a shitty life -- and I won't disagree with her. Yes, its true that a good deal of it is her fault, but there's only so much that you can do when there's no forward momentum in your life.
I still miss Michele. As always, I could write a 5,000 word essay on that subject with lots of old pictures and bad music from The Cure, but in the end it would just be 4,996 words to much. It's been almost four years and everytime I think I've finally let go, the sinking realization sets in that she was perfect for me and I failed to move. I think its the last part that hurts the most.
I'm very much at a loss for what I want to do with my life. I've groomed myself to believe that business is where its at and what I need to be doing. Marketing, management, IT, information systems and the like with an MBA on top of all that. The funny thing is, there's a better chance of me winding up working at a newspaper than there is of me working at a Fortune 500 company. And you know what, as long as I'm happy I would be absolutely fine with that.
I love my mom. And my dad. And even my baby sister -- who turns 21 in a month -- too. I'm very blessed to have a family I love and one that loves me back. Throughout my travels, I've found out that my life is not the norm for everyone.
I'm not sure why lately, but I have been loving milk. And hot toast. Not necessarily together, but that's fine too.
Sleeping alone is fine. I enjoy my space, my covers, and the ability to fart in my sleep without waking up wondering if I farted. But there's something nice about sleeping in the same bed with a woman from time to time. Their sheets are clean, their pillows are fluffy, and the room smells good. Then there's those moments when you wake up and realize that she's rolled over to where she's sleeping on your back. As much as you want to move her because its sort of uncomfortable, you let her stay. It's actually more comfortable that way.
There's something about the breeze of early springtime. With its arrival comes the promise of new adventures and untapped potential. However it also carries with it an ocean of memories and emotions that you thought you had forgotten...
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